Contact Me
Heather S Newby, LPC
For Collaborative Professionals
Family Attorneys, Fellow Therapists, Clergy
If you've ever sat with a client/couple/parishioner who is contemplating divorce, but they're not fully decided, maybe they’re conflicted or not aligned with their partner about next steps, that’s often where Discernment Counseling can be helpful.
What I Offer
Discernment Counseling is a brief, structured process (typically 1–5 sessions) that helps couples get clear about whether they are moving toward divorce or trying to repair the relationship.
It’s not couples therapy.
We’re not working on the marriage itself, we’re helping them decide what to do about it.
By the end of the process, couples are able to choose one of three directions:
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Stay in the relationship as it is
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Move toward separation or divorce
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Commit to couples therapy with a clear intention
Who It Works Best For
This is especially helpful when one partner is leaning out and the other is leaning in, or when there’s a lot of ambivalence and pressure to make a decision.
It works best when both partners are willing to come in and at least one is open to looking at their own role in what’s happened.
I’m not the right fit when there’s active coercion, suspicion of physical abuse, or one spouse has already made a final decision to divorce.
How This Helps You (and Them)
What I’ve seen is that when clients take the time to go through discernment first, they come out of it much clearer and more settled in their decision.
That tends to mean:
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less back-and-forth once the legal process starts
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more follow-through
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a steadier entry into collaborative divorce, if that’s the direction they choose
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clear direction and debrief for those returning to their couples' work
How It Works
My role is neutral and structured.
I’m helping them slow things down just enough to understand what’s happened in the relationship and what each person is willing (or not willing) to do moving forward.
If You’re Unsure About a Referral
If you’re sitting with a client and thinking, they’re not quite ready to move forward, but they’re not stepping back either, that’s usually a good time to refer.
I’m always happy to consult if you want to talk through a specific situation.